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The New York Giants just won the Super-Bowl. I hope they're happy.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Football
Today, as far as the majority of Americans are concerned, is a major holiday, along the lines of Thanksgiving and Independence Day. It's Super-Bowl Sunday.
To be honest, I couldn't care less. Football bores me, as does every other sport. I'm not really sure what's so boring about them, but I can't get interested. In fact, I care so little that I didn't even know who was playing until the game started. (For those of you like me: it's the New York Giants and the New England Patriots. But I might not have the right cities with the right teams.)
I find football pretty much pointless. In fact, I consider all sports pretty much pointless. If you, the reader, disagree with me and enjoy sports, then good for you. It gives you something to do in your free time. But since it bores me, I'm going to try to come up with new ways of making it more interesting.
Imagine if the Super-Bowl were open to everyone. What if anyone, no matter how bad at football, could go play in the biggest game in the entire world. Well, the Super-Bowl would be boring and no one would watch anymore. This won't work.
Well, what if the teams shared the ball. All the players most likely tell their children to share toys and such, so maybe they should start practicing what they preach. But again, this would be boring, wouldn't it?
Okay, so what if one team just forgave the other? If they just worked around their differences, maybe they wouldn't have to have a giant fight over a small leather ball. Oh, but then there wouldn't be a game at all.
Do you realize that football, in all the three areas I just mentioned (nondiscrimination, sharing and forgiveness), comepletely undermines all the values taught to small children? Maybe it should be rated something higher. PG, at least. Preferably PG-13, or even R. That way all the little kids all over the world could be taught these values with more sucess.
Please, join me in my campaign to censor the Super-Bowl. Contact your local TV stations and complain. Together, we can defeat this international killer of morals.
Don't worry, football fans. I'm not serious.
Goodbye, valiant reader,
Mitchell
To be honest, I couldn't care less. Football bores me, as does every other sport. I'm not really sure what's so boring about them, but I can't get interested. In fact, I care so little that I didn't even know who was playing until the game started. (For those of you like me: it's the New York Giants and the New England Patriots. But I might not have the right cities with the right teams.)
I find football pretty much pointless. In fact, I consider all sports pretty much pointless. If you, the reader, disagree with me and enjoy sports, then good for you. It gives you something to do in your free time. But since it bores me, I'm going to try to come up with new ways of making it more interesting.
Imagine if the Super-Bowl were open to everyone. What if anyone, no matter how bad at football, could go play in the biggest game in the entire world. Well, the Super-Bowl would be boring and no one would watch anymore. This won't work.
Well, what if the teams shared the ball. All the players most likely tell their children to share toys and such, so maybe they should start practicing what they preach. But again, this would be boring, wouldn't it?
Okay, so what if one team just forgave the other? If they just worked around their differences, maybe they wouldn't have to have a giant fight over a small leather ball. Oh, but then there wouldn't be a game at all.
Do you realize that football, in all the three areas I just mentioned (nondiscrimination, sharing and forgiveness), comepletely undermines all the values taught to small children? Maybe it should be rated something higher. PG, at least. Preferably PG-13, or even R. That way all the little kids all over the world could be taught these values with more sucess.
Please, join me in my campaign to censor the Super-Bowl. Contact your local TV stations and complain. Together, we can defeat this international killer of morals.
Don't worry, football fans. I'm not serious.
Goodbye, valiant reader,
Mitchell
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